It was late in December,
Our breasts filled with bile;
Santa was checking his Hypercard file.
All this bah-humbug was making Scrooge smile;
The Ghost of Posts-Yet-to-Rile
Showed me these non-Al messages.
Folks go flaming in the failing light.
Non-Al messages!
Buy me a ticket on the last train home tonight.

Well I'm not the kind who hates to digress,
The odd scenic route makes the ennui less.
But certain subjects are best left unaddressed;
You won't persuade me I don't know best
By these non-Al messages!
There's something back there that we left behind!
Non-Al messages!
Buy me a ticket on the last train home tonight.

Hear them argue and feel your bowels starting to churn;
You can't possibly really think they'll ever learn!?
Xmas charades that we play . . .

May your New Year be truly terrific,
And merry something non-specific,
'Neath mistletoe-moon, I hope you get kissed,
But, most of all, peace on the list.
From non-Al messages,
I'd rather some threads be kept out of sight!
Non-Al messages!
Buy me a ticket on the last train home tonight . . .

Truth to tell, I've been teetering on the brink of unsubscribing for a few weeks now (suppress cheers please, I haven't done it yet ). I've nothing against off-topic posts, in the main, but I think that there are some subjects (traditionally politics and religion) that it's neither desirable nor human to be able to discuss calmly, dispassionately, or even tolerantly. I, at least, have no desire to learn to talk and behave indifferently about things that matter. Seems to me political opinion has been raising its ugly heads 'round here rather frequently of late. All very well and good perhaps when it's directly Al-related (e.g. Nazis) or list-related (what to do with the raffle money), but arguing the fine points of politics in basically social venues, in my experience, achieves nothing beyond elevating blood pressures above even the seasonal average. As someone who has made PETA the main beneficiary in his will, I have with considerable difficulty refrained from commenting on the issue other than to say 'count me out if the money goes to a medical research operation.' I really think that's all that is necessary, especially at this time of year (we're naturally allowed to treat one another savagely the other twelve months ).

I'm celebrating Saturnalia, myself, that quaint, Roman, end-of-December festival characterised by gift-giving, evergreens, partying, &c. Lasted about twelve days, if I recall, during which the Golden Age was supposed to return (non-violence, general benvolence, equality among humans, and suchlike stuff).

Happy Saturnalia, all!

Brian L Chaffin (chaff002@maroon.tc.umn.edu)